Cobweb (2023)

26.8.23

I love Antony Starr as ‘evil asshole Superman’ in the disgustingly dark show The Boys, so when I saw him appear in the trailer for Cobweb, I just had to check it out. Sadly, the film doesn’t stand out in a crowded field of suburban horrors. Director Samuel Bodin just about delivers a competent and creepy tale that rises above mere knock-off status, even though the script feels like a lightweight composite of frightening but conventional conceits.

The young protagonist, Peter, is played skillfully by Woody Norman (from C’mon C’mon), even though his struggles feel so familiar. The generic school bullies have obvious cause, but the vivid nightmares and eerie noises from inside his bedroom wall may not just be products of his overactive imagination. His parents dismiss concerns (played by Starr and Lizzy Caplan), but Peter’s teacher suspects threat from within the family. The script could have dug deeper into the dynamics of this family in crisis, as Starr and Kaplan simplistically play roles reflecting fairytale caricatures, walking a tightrope between benign and sinister as Peter’s parents. In minor praise, I felt that Cleopatra Coleman as the teacher brings some warmth and capacity to an underwritten role.

Once the true villain emerges, the film descends into visceral chaos with a few intensely gory confrontations. While the ending feels rushed and a last-minute twist lands clumsily, the journey up to that point provides tautly chilling yet superficial entertainment. Overall, it’s a story without much logic, intriguing backstory or strength under scrutiny, but I suppose that’s to be expected from writer Chris Devlin, who also wrote last year’s awful Texas Chainsaw Massacre reboot.

Cobweb reinvents nothing new and feels too safe to be anything but mildly satisfying. Last year’s premier home-based horror was Barbarian, and sadly this is miles away from it in terms of invention or scares. As well as having a tedious title that has almost no relevance to the narrative, it’s unfortunate that Cobweb ends with such a weak ‘non-ending’, which annoyingly teases a sequel whilst at the same time leaving audiences indifferent to seeing it.

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